Why Death Doula / Midwife?  My Journey and Tools collected along the way so that I help others...   

• I have always enjoyed deep, meaningful conversations and helping others through these conversations. 

• I experienced a call to meditate in 2014 that initiated my introduction into Kundalini Yoga, which includes breathwork, chanting, and a spiritual practice to get in touch with the higher self. I see now how these elements ground me to be able to be present and hold space for clients.  

• Since about 2016, I have journaled and meditated on "What is my purpose? How can I help others in my next chapter of life?" The many elements contained on this page have coalesced, synthesizing this endeavor.  

• Opening to my Heart ~ In May of 2017, I committed to a "heart opening tour" to re-connect with my "heart-strings," that is going to visit the most meaningful people in my life. This tour opened a new chapter in my spiritual awakening journey, and I now realize that heart opening is required and interrelated to opening the third eye.  

• Reiki ~ Reiki is a  relaxing, no or minimal touch practice that channels energy through the practitioner to the client. This can be helpful as part of the dying process if physical, emotional, or mental pain or discomfort  is experienced.  February 2022 ~ Completed Level 3/Master Reiki training course after my initial Level 1 Certificate in in September 2017 and Level 2 in July 2021.  I am developing my own take on reiki that adds on intuitive readings, guided mediations, singing bowls, tuning forks. I 

•  INELDA End-of-Life Doula Certificate  ~ In May 2022, I received this certificate as the experiences on this page cemented my passion on this path. I am currently working to get the hands-on hours with clients needed to obtain my certification. Click here to read more about this certificate. 

• Ceremonies ~ I have experienced three plant medicine journeys so far. They were performed by trained, beautiful, wise experts who conducted gorgeous ceremonies to help me connect to my soul. Music was a key part of these ceremonies. I have a routine self-care practice that maintains this connection. This process of inner journey work is a really powerful way to find the answers we seek.  

• Twin Flame Journey ~ Over the past few years in meditation, I started calling in a spiritual partner. On September 29, 2021, I had a startling hypnagogic flame vision and thought my bedroom side table was on fire. This vision kicked off a quest-like journey that includes my adventures in my spiritual awakening, magnetizing my twin flame, and awakening my third eye. I'm working on sharing my experiences on this website, especially to help others thrive during separation. 

• Intuitive Readings ~ As I have opened to my heart, so my third eye and intuition has also opened.  It feels like a process of learning to speak the language of and dialog with my higher self. I have learned to more and more deeply trust and follow the signs to lead me along my path. I see so clearly now that even paths that seems like they didn't result in a certain "outcome" were actually critical to my intention. The universe conspires in our favor, so the key to intuition is being able to decipher how each situation benefits us and respond from the spiritual perspective - not the usual ego knee-jerk reaction. I have been using Destiny of Cards, Tarot cards, and oracle cards to help gain insights into the nature of our situations.   

• Cannabis-assisted Practices ~  I often use cannabis as a way to tap into my higher self, my intuition, and my energy and spiritual practices. 

I dedicate my work as a doula to my dear ones who have transitioned to the other side, have lead me to my path and purpose, and continue to support me in my journey. This may seem like a lot of personal information, but my intent is to convey how these seemingly unrelated events and interests have come together to give me my current path and purpose. Because of the "deep active listening" process used with clients, I stay focused on the clients' experiences rather than my own. I thought this background could be serve as a way to connect on common ground. Each death has offered me valuable insights and motivations towards my current path. 

• • April 5, 2000 ~ My former fiancé committed suicide. I was in shock and did not start grief processing until 2016. I feel connected to him in this doula work since he was a social worker.  

  • December 10, 2000 ~ My dad gave me the word "heartstring" after he passed. He planted a seed of curiosity about the after life, spirituality, souls, life between lives. I learned the beauty, deep healing, and cathartic importance of funeral rituals as I experienced his funeral in Ireland, immersed in the grieving process, surrounded by family. 

  • May 26, 2013 ~ My mom, my foundation in life. I carried a guilt of not knowing how to give my mom a "good death" and how to talk about death with her. This has been a big motivation to learn how to do things better. I re-processed her death by imaging giving her a better experience transitioning into the afterlife. I also find it healing to visit my parents in meditation where we sit around and visit with other close friends and family.  

  • September 12, 2013 ~ My husband's grandmother was the closest thing to a grandmother that I've had. She was a ray of sunshine that still inspires me.  This was another death that I experienced as less than ideal and helped motivate me to this path as a way to actualize the lessons learned. The silver lining was my first experience of a hospice volunteer "angel," whose kindness contributed to pointing me in the direction of a helping people to have good deaths.

  • January 11, 2021 ~ My father-in-law passed after a four-year "slide into home." This was another death where we "ignored the elephant in the room" as we avoided acknowledging he was dying, and the opportunity to talk about it. 

  • Fall of 2021 ~ The day after the flame vision referenced above in the Twin Flame section and in the span of six weeks, I learned of five deaths: one of oldest and dearest friends, a pet, a mentor, a family member, and a close friend's husband. I was lucky to have that close friend as a "grief buddy," which provided a beautiful way to help grieve and heal through a shared experience. We have both been so grateful to share our loved ones' signs that we continue to experience.  This is known as a healthy practice called continuing bonds (see Resources here).  

  • July 23, 2022 ~ My husband, friend, and partner in life for the past 23 years passed after a massive heart attack. Brian's life and his passing has obviously had a massive impact on our family and friends, especially for my teenage boys. The ripples of his life, death, and his afterlife will continue to be a part of my story for a long time, and this website can only reflect a small portion of that. I became my first doula client. I started my Signs of Brian blog as a way to process my grief and to share how we were doing with friends who were also grieving Brian. By making my grief process "open sourced" on this website, I also am modeling a journey in grief in case it can help others.